You already know, you came here to hear me complain.

Man, I tell you, I just do not understand somethings.  And perhaps I never will understand those things.  I have to miss work, which I so very badly need, to go to court.  I show up 15 minutes early, because if you aren't 15 minutes early in the military, you are not on time.  So I go about my day, programmed as I am by the greatest brain washers in the cosmos, the United States military-industrial complex  only to find that my hearing will be at 11 instead of 9.  Ok, this is fair, I know how the upper crust works, they get to doing things when it conveniences them, we the masses will deal with the burden of their tardiness.  It is not a big deal.  This is how things work, we should all be used to it by now.  So I am missing work, which I can't afford to miss, and I show up at the court again at 11 only to find that the Judge has gotten here early, 10:30, and now I am late to my court appearance, but fortunately I get to put in my plea, that being of NOT GUILTY.

This means that I have to miss another day of work that I need for court.  How am I supposed to afford an attorney if I don't get to go to work?  Glad you asked.  Because money is fake, meaning it is a representation of a loan to our government by central banks, all that is needed is for me to print my own money.  You may think this is called counterfeit, but it is entirely legal, the Federal Reserve does this all the time, printing money it has absolutely no way of otherwise backing up with any sort of collateral.  So I will just start printing my own form of currency, (it is not illegal to make your own currency, it is to try to make theirs).  It is called the Felsonéro.  You can see it on the top of my page.  It shows my double chin, which is a good indicator of wealth, the excessive conglomeration of fat cells that aggregate under one's jawbone.

What do you think will happen when I try to start paying people with my own form of currency?  I mean, it is as legitimate as the next person's.  I will do everything in my power to make it out of cotton and put in all the symbols and hidden shit to make it so it is damn near impossible to recreate by anyone than myself thus ensuring it is a quality form of currency.

Because, you know, I would probably have about as much luck giving them my own fake money as I would giving them my money card.  I would probably be met with blank stares.  Like you don't understand what is going on here people.  You know damn well I am not a cash cow.  All I am good for is labor.  That and pleasuring women.  A lot of good it does to be good at pleasuring women if you don't have any money....hahah.

I digress.  Money makes the world go round and round folks.  And if you don't know, now you know, nigga.

Lastly, before I get back to my other job, that of writing and editing actual literature, I would like to direct your attention to the funny man, Jim Carrey.  Seems like he had himself an awakening... and all it took was losing the most incredible sex symbol of my time, Jenny McCarthy.